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C-141 - 84

A US Air Force C-141 was scheduled to leave Thule Air Base, Greenland
at midnight. During the pilot's preflight check, he discovered that the
aircraft's latrine holding tank was still full from the last flight.
So a message was sent to the base, and an airman who was off duty is called
out to take care of it.

The young man finally got to the air base and made his way to the
aircraft, only to find that the latrine pump truck had been left
outdoors and was frozen solid, so he had to find another one in the hangar,
which takes even more time. He returned to the aircraft and was less than
enthusiastic about what he had to do. Nevertheless, he went about the
pumping job deliberately and carefully (and slowly) so as to not risk
criticism later.

As he's left the plane, the pilot stopped him and said, "Son, your
attitude and performance has caused this flight to be late, and I'm
going to personally see to it that you are not just reprimanded, but
punished."

Shivering in the cold, his task finished, the airman took a deep
breath, stood up tall and said, "Sir, with all due respect, I'm not your son;
I'm an Airman in the United States Air Force. I've been in Thule,
Greenland for 11 months without any leave, and the reindeer are beginning to
look pretty good to me. I have one stripe, it's two-thirty in the morning,
the temperature is 40 degrees below zero and my job here is to pump sh*t
from your aircraft. Now just exactly what form of punishment did you have
in mind?"

Nurse Nancy - 65

Two doctors are in the hallway complaining about nurse Nancy.
''She's out of control!'' the first doctor says. ''She does
everything
backwards. Just last week I told her to give a man two milligrams of
morphine every ten hours, she gave him 10 milligrams every two hours,
he
alomost died!''


''That's nothing,'' said the second doctor, “earlier this week I told
her
to give a man an enema every 24 hours, she tried to give him 24 enemas
in
one hour!''


All of a sudden they heard a blood curldling scream from down the
hallway.


''OH MY GOD! I just realized that I told nurse Nancy to prick Mr.
Smiths
boil!'''