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From doctor to mechanic - 106

After 40 years as a gynaecologist, John decided he had enough money to
retire and take up his real love, auto mechanics. He left his
practice, enrolled in auto mechanics school, and studied hard. The day
of the final exam came and John worried if he would be able to
complete the test with the same proficiency as his younger classmates.
Most of the students completed their exam in two hours. John, on the
other hand, took the entire four hours allotted. The following day,
John was delighted and surprised to see a score of 150% for his exam.
John spoke to his professor after class. "I never dreamed I could do
this well on the exam. How did I earn a score of 150%?" The professor
replied, "I gave you 50% for perfectly disassembling the car engine. I
awarded another 50% for perfectly reassembling the engine. I gave you
an additional 50% for having done all of it through the muffler."

Old Lady's Phone - 72

An elderly lady phoned her telephone company to report that her
telephone failed to ring when her friends called -- and that on the few
occasions when it did ring, her pet dog always moaned right before the phone
rang. The telephone repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to see this
psychic dog or senile elderly lady. He climbed a nearby telephone
pole, hooked in his test set, and dialed the subscriber's house. The phone
didn't ring right away, but then the dog moaned loudly and the
telephone began to ring. Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman
found.....

1. The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire via a steel
chain and collar.
2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose.
3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the phone
number was called.
4. After a couple of such jolts, the dog would start moaning and then
urinate on himself and the ground.
5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone
to ring.

....Which goes to show that some problems CAN be fixed by pissing and
moaning