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It's only a joke - 99

A Roadway driver is driving east on Route 66 he sees a truck driving
west and the CB crackles to life. "Hey Roadway driver, who are the two
biggest fags in America?" comes from the CB. The Roadway driver
replies, "I don't know." The other trucker says " You and your
brother." Well the Roadway driver gets annoyed but the other driver
tells him "It's just a joke - tell it to the next truck you see."

Well the Roadway driver drives for about an hour and finally sees
another truck. He gets on the CB and says "Hey other truck, do you
know who the two biggest fags in the world are?" The other trucker
says, "I don't know, who?" The roadway driver replies "Me and my
brother."

Cowboy Boots - 121

An elderly couple,

Margaret and Bert, moved to Texas .

Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home.

Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, 'Notice anything different about me?'

Margaret looked him over. 'Nope.'

Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots.

Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time, 'Notice anything different NOW?'

Margaret looked up and exclaimed, 'Bert, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow!'

Furious, Bert yelled,

'AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?'

'Nope', she replied.

'IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!'

Without changing her expression,

Margaret replied,

'Shoulda bought a hat, Bert.

Shoulda bought a hat.'