HOME TOP JOKES CATEGORY SUBMIT SEARCH CONTACT

Which one is funnier? Click to Pick!

Like a baby - 48

A young couple is on their way to Vegas to get married. Before getting
there, the girl said to the guy that she has a confession to make: the
reason that they have not been too intimate is because she is very flat
chested. If he wishes to cancel the wedding, it's okay with her. The guy
thought about it for a while, and said he does not mind she is flat, and
sex is not the most important thing in a marriage.

Several miles down the road, the guy turned to the girl and said that he
also wants to make a confession; he said below his waist, it is just like
a baby. If the girl wants to cancel the marriage, it's okay with him. The
girl thought about it for a while and said that she does not mind, and she
also believed there are other things far more important than sex in a
marriage.

They were happy that they are honest with each other. They went on to
Vegas and got married. On their wedding night, the girl took off her
clothes, she was flat as a washboard. Finally, the guy took off his
clothes. One glance at the guy's naked body, the girl fainted and fell to
the floor.

After she became conscious the guy asked: "I told you before we got
married, why did you still faint?"

The girl said: "You told me it was just like a baby".

The guy replied: "Yes, 8 pounds and 21 inches".

Blond Diary - 16

Dear Diary,
Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double pane energy-efficient
kind. Then, this week I got a call from the contractor who installed them. He was complaining
that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.
Now just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking Sales guy had told me last year.... Namely, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay
for themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year!
There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally Just hung up.
He didn't call back. Bet he felt dumb!