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Insulting Parrot - 77

A lady was walking past a pet store when a parrot said, ''Hey, lady!
You're really ugly!" The lady was furious and continued on her way.

On the way home, she passed by the petstore again and the parrot once
more said "Hey, lady! You're really ugly!"

The lady was so angy that she went into the store and told the store
manager that she would sue the store if it didn't stop insulting her.

The store manager apologized profusely and promised he would make sure
the parrot didn't say it again.

The next day, the lady deliberately passed by the store to test the
parrot.

"Hey, lady!" the parrot said.

"Yes?" said the lady...

"You know!" said the parrot.

Blonde Joke - 11

A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money,
decided to hire herself out as a "handy-woman" and
started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.


She went to the front door of the first house, and
asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.

"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my
porch," he said, "How much will you charge me?"


The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?"

The man agreed and told her that the paint and

everything she would need were in the garage

The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to
her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes
all the way around the house?"

He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"

The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm
starting to believe all those 'dumb blonde' jokes
we've been getting by e-mail lately." A short time
later, the blonde came to the door to collect her
money.

"You're finished already?" the husband asked.

"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint left
over, so I gave it two coats."

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the
$50.00 and handed it to her.

"And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a
Porch, it's a Lexus