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What goes first? - 41

The Sunday School teacher was speaking to her class one Sunday morning
and she asked the question, "When you die and go to Heaven, which part of
your body goes first?"

Suzie raised her hand and said, "I think it's your hands."


"Why do you think it's your hands, Suzie?"


Suzie replied, "Because when you pray, you hold your hands together
in front of you and God just takes your hands first!"


"What a wonderful answer!" the teacher said.


Now, Little Johnny raised his hand and said, "Teacher, I think it's
your legs."


The teacher looked at him with the strangest look on her face as Johnny is
known for his antics. Hesitant to ask, the teacher said, "Now, Johnny,
why do you think it would be your legs?"


Lil Johnny said, "Well, I walked into Mommy and Daddy's bedroom the
other night, Mommy had her legs straight up in the air and she was moaning,
'God, I'm coming!', and if Dad hadn't had her pinned down, we'd have lost
her for sure!"

Terms of endearment - 32

A man was invited to a friend's home for dinner, where he noticed that
his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms,
calling her Honey, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, and so forth. He was
impressed at this, since the couple had been married over 50 years.

While the wife was in the kitchen, he said, "I think it's wonderful
that after all these years you still call your wife those cute little
pet names."

His buddy hung his head. "To tell you the truth, I forgot her name
about 10 years ago."
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