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Terms of endearment - 32

A man was invited to a friend's home for dinner, where he noticed that
his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms,
calling her Honey, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, and so forth. He was
impressed at this, since the couple had been married over 50 years.

While the wife was in the kitchen, he said, "I think it's wonderful
that after all these years you still call your wife those cute little
pet names."

His buddy hung his head. "To tell you the truth, I forgot her name
about 10 years ago."
v

Hole Behind - 78

A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf course,
became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around, he
saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her, explained his
confusion and asked her if she knew what hole he was playing.
She replied, "I'm on the 7th hole and you are a hole behind me, so
you must be on the 6th hole." He thanked her and went back to his golf.

On the back nine the same thing happened and he approached her again
with the same request. She said, "I'm on the 14th, and you are a hole
behind me, so you must be on the 13th." Once again he thanked her and
returned to his play.

He finished his round and went into the club house where he saw the lady
sitting at the end of the bar. He asked the bartender if he knew the lady.
The bartender said that she was a sales lady and played the course often.

He approached her and said, "Let me buy you a drink to show my
appreciation for your help. I understand that you are a sales
lady ....
well, I am in sales also. What do you sell?"

She replied, "If I told you, you would only laugh."

"No I wouldn't," he said and persisted that she tell him what she sold.

"Well if you must know", she answered, "I sell Tampax."

With that, he fell on the floor and laughed so hard he almost lost
his breath. She said, "See I knew you would laugh."

"That's not what I'm laughing at," he replied, "I'm a toilet paper
salesman, so I'm still a hole behind you!"